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In advance of the election, many faith leaders weighed in with their opinions about the presidential candidates. Abortion was a focus of many articles, tweets, and videos. As Christians who embrace the sanctity of life of the unborn, we were faced with two candidates with opposing abortion beliefs: protecting life in the womb or expanding elective abortion up to 40 weeks of pregnancy and even infanticide. The choice seemed clear, yet many faith leaders added their nuanced positions regarding the candidates.

What is the church to do with or think about these diverse opinions from prominent pastors and faith leaders, many of whom we trust for their spiritual counsel?

Although, at times, we do need biblical guidance from pastors and Christian leaders, what is often neglected are the perspectives of those who have experienced the pain of abortion, who have worked in abortion clinics, and those on the frontlines in pregnancy centers who counsel women and men, daily, facing the crisis of an unplanned pregnancy.

Are faith leaders willing to step down from their pulpits and open space on their platforms to highlight these voices?

Kelly Lester’s Voice

Kelly was a freshman in high school when she snuck out in the middle of the night to attend a party with friends. After years of being bullied and teased in school, Kelly was finally finding acceptance in certain social circles. It was her first party. But, by the end of that night, she was raped by one of the most popular guys in school.

The next day was Sunday. Kelly got up and attended church with her family. She needed to confide to someone the tragic events of the night before. Her youth pastor was someone she felt she could trust. “See, if you had never snuck out, gone to that party, and gotten drunk, that would never have happened,” her youth leader coldly responded. That comment cut Kelly so deep with shame and condemnation that, at that moment, she questioned how God could ever love her. From that day forward, the church was not a place to fail or make a mistake, and it was not a safe place for Kelly Lester.

Freely giving away what was taken from her, Kelly then found herself pregnant at fifteen. Her boyfriend’s mother drove her to an abortion clinic, placed a wad of cash in her hand, and sent her into the clinic alone.

“That day changed my life,” Kelly remembers. “They say pregnancy can ruin your life, but that day—in the abortion clinic—ruined my life.”

During the next fifteen years, Kelly would spiral into the deepest pit of her life: drug and alcohol addiction, anorexia, suicide attempts, feeding the depths of her pain with men and sex, and regretfully three more abortions.

Lost Moments

On that Sunday, when the youth leader condemned Kelly rather than biblically counseling and loving her through her trauma, it was a lost moment for that church and pastor. “Many of the decisions I made after that day was my search for a safe place,” Kelly admits. “Looking for that guy who would protect me. Working at an abortion clinic wanting to help women find a safe place to help them with what I had experienced. People in crisis form their own safety nets no matter if it is a net that surrounds them in sin and dysfunction.”

For fifteen years, Kelly believed that the church was not a place of safety. According to a Pew Research study, in 2019, only 4% of sermons shared online on U.S. church websites discussed abortion. And if they did address the topic, it was rarely mentioned again. It’s a sad commentary on the state of the evangelical pulpit when it’s estimated that two out of every five abortions happen to women who attend church.

The influx of Christian voices regarding the election only seemed to heighten the tensions around the political issue of abortion. On a post-election podcast, “Veggie Tales” creator Phil Vischer stated the following:

But Kelly Lester disagrees with Vischer, “If Biden wins, the church needs to vocally advocate for the unborn, religious liberty, the immigrant, the refugee, the poor, civility, and honesty. If Trump wins, the church needs to vocally advocate for the unborn, religious liberty, the immigrant, the refugee, the poor, civility, and honesty. The common denominator is: The church needs to stop expecting the government to be the church.”

Elections are important, and as Christians, we should vote our biblical values that protect the sanctity of life in the womb, but at the end of the day, it is your community and church that makes the most difference.

David French recently wrote about the importance of local engagement and how we often put more importance on national politics within the pro-life community: “We’re most passionate about the president. Yet too many of us are less interested in the crisis pregnancy center down the street. Without forsaking national politics, we can reverse that intensity, and if we reverse that intensity through loving, intentional outreach, we will reinforce the very decision the data and our experience tells us a woman wants to make.”

Are we losing critical moments because too many faith leaders add their voices to national politics without highlighting the role of the local church and pregnancy resource centers?  Are we losing young women from our congregations because the church does not talk about abortion or provide a safety net in crisis?

It’s Time to Wash Feet

“It’s easy for people to make a hypothesis regarding abortion. But when you have lived it, you don’t have to hypothesize about these things,” Kelly acknowledges. “It’s not a political issue or a moral issue, but a real woman’s life, where she is trying to figure out how she is going to make it to the next day. When you understand that, it changes your perspective.”

God has given many prominent faith leaders public platforms to share biblical wisdom over political and moral issues. But what if they shared their pulpits to highlight testimonies like Kelly Lester’s that speak directly about abortion from personal experience.

Planned Parenthood, the largest provider of abortions, uses words on their website like ‘safe,’ ‘safety net,’ ‘care,’ and ‘support’ because women in crisis are searching for that safe place. As followers of Christ, we can be that place of refuge through our words, the care we provide, and by sharing the gospel that brings life.

“Being a safe place does not mean we allow people to stay in their sin. That’s not safe either,” admits Kelly. “Sin brings death and destruction, but the gospel of Jesus Christ brings about a heart change. If the church is not a refuge for those in crisis, the thousands in our pews won’t feel safe sharing their dark secret of abortion that has haunted many of them for decades. Some of these men and women sing in our choirs and even preach in our pulpits. Shame has kept them silent for too long. If the enemy can’t have your life, he will try and steal your identity in shame.”

Today, Kelly Lester walks in freedom from addiction and her past abortions because she chose to walk into the safe arms of her Savior, Jesus Christ. She is a wife and mother of six beautiful children. God redeemed that lost moment in her life, and she embraces Romans 8:1, “Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

In this post-election season, Kelly’s voice is a message of hope, “Church, it is time to stop pointing fingers and start washing feet. As Christ-followers, we are called to fill in the missing gaps that no election result will fill. Because those gaps are in people’s hearts, and they can only be filled with the hope of Jesus Christ.”

The presidential election may bring further challenges for the pro-life community, but our mission to protect life does not change. Your church, community, and local pregnancy resource center is where the safety net resides. Let’s highlight the voices who can speak life into our friends, neighbors, and our congregations.

 

To book Kelly Lester for a speaking event contact media@prolove.com and follow her on Facebook @kellylesterforlife.

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There’s this saying, “You only know what you know, until you know better.” This statement accurately describes my journey of understanding abortion and the pro-life movement.

Seven years ago, when I felt God calling me to be active in the pro-life mission, I had no idea where my calling would lead me. All I knew was that I was to be obedient and try to understand as much as I could about the pro-life movement and information surrounding abortion.

It’s humbling to realize you know so little about something you may be very passionate about. I might have been a bit naïve at first. Ha! But seven years later, I can now say I know so much more about the abortion issue and the pro-life movement. And yet, sometimes, it feels like I have so much more to learn.

Here’s one thing I do know. Saying you’re pro-life is also committing to educating yourself about the overall movement. It’s about relationships and realizing many individuals and organizations have the same mission with a different focus.

As a pro-life Christian, it has been encouraging to witness more church leaders and prominent Christian voices take a stand for life. They are speaking the truth about abortion but with a compassionate, Christ-like response—that holds the life of the mother with equal compassion as the life of her unborn baby.

But I am also concerned about how some of these prominent Christian voices portray the pro-life movement. They often talk about loud, angry voices at abortion clinic sidewalks or hateful signs at Life Marches. An angry mob who doesn’t care about the women and men who face unplanned pregnancies, but only the unborn baby in the womb. That’s not the pro-life community I have come to know.

And then I learn these same Christian leaders have not educated themselves about the pro-life movement. They haven’t joined the thousands and thousands of mostly young marchers at a recent March for Life, and haven’t formed relationships within the community. They don’t know all they could— and they need to know better.

In my seven-year pro-life educational journey, I am always amazed at the compassionate response to abortion:

  • The sidewalk counselors who pray quietly for the women who will enter an abortion clinic that day. Or those who gently approach the mothers and fathers asking if they may talk with them about another alternative to abortion.
  • The pregnancy center employees and volunteers who have face-to-face conversations with abortion-vulnerable women and men. They witness tragic circumstances with crisis pregnancies but are determined to offer a compassionate, loving response no matter the outcome.
  • The numerous pro-life organizations that donate thousands and thousands of needed baby supplies to mothers who choose life and are in desperate need.
  • The church groups who make handmade baby quilts for their local pregnancy center or who donate diapers and formula.
  • The prayer warriors who stand outside government buildings and seek the throne of God over ongoing abortion legislation. Their prayers are silent in voice but passionate in their prayer-focused mission.
  • The ministries who walk through the healing process with post-abortive women and men, offering them freedom and forgiveness through the gospel of Jesus Christ.

The list goes on, and I am humbled and encouraged by those who stand together in this movement called pro-life. It has profoundly affected my faith as a follower of Jesus Christ. I understand more about the grace of God because of the relationships I have formed within the pro-life community.

Are there facets of the movement who lack a Christ-like response? Yes, absolutely, but they are a small segment, and they do not represent the pro-life movement as a whole.

So here’s my challenge to pastors, leaders, and prominent Christian voices who are willing to stand openly with the message of life. Educate yourself about the pro-life movement and mission. Don’t set yourself apart before you have all the facts in front of you. Venture outside the walls of your church and denomination to build relationships with pro-life ministries. Join us in January for the March for Life, and witness the overwhelmingly compassionate, Christ-like response to abortion. Please don’t take a self-righteous posture toward the pro-life community. We need unity because even though our focus may differ, our mission is the same. And let’s all agree to keep learning and growing so we know better how to be genuinely pro-life, or Pro Abundant Life (Matthew 28:18-20) as Christ calls us to be!

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“Would you like to go pray with me outside Planned Parenthood?” my friend asked.

“Sure,” I responded.

We scheduled a day and time and put it on our calendars.

Now, this is not a regular event for me. I have never prayed outside an abortion clinic even though I support organizations and individuals who do make prayer vigils a part of their mission in reaching women, men, and the unborn.

I was a little hesitant, but I never told my friend. There are many events I have taken part in with my pro-life stance, but prayer on the “frontlines” didn’t seem like my thing.

A Sidewalk View

We arrived at Planned Parenthood and found a young woman handing out pamphlets to those driving into the clinic and quietly praying over each individual as they entered the building. We greeted her on the sidewalk and exchanged names. In our conversation, we find out this twenty-one year old has been praying on the frontlines—in the various states, she has lived in— since she was eight years old.  Wow, I wanted to reach out and hug her with pride, all while bowing my head in shame. It’s taken me forty-some years to stand alongside her.

While all three of us were talking, a woman got out of an Uber car heading toward Planned Parenthood. She was walking past us, and our new friend started to engage her in conversation. The woman was friendly and engaging. We find out she is a local university student, pregnant, and unsure of what she is going to do about her baby. She knows it is a baby. The saved photos on her cell phone reveal she’s been wondering—dreaming—about what her child might look like. She’s black, and the father is white. All four of us react with joy and awe over the beautiful faces of racially mixed babies on her phone.

She wants an ultrasound to find out how far along she is. The price of that ultrasound is an expense above what she can afford. She relays her financial struggles and her history— a refugee orphan, saved from a worn-torn African nation, no family to speak of, English is her second language.

“I have no one!” she repeats several times throughout our conversation.

This woman’s story becomes so much more than that baby inside of her. We are now silently praying for that soul within a soul.

“Do you know,” I interrupt, “that you can get an ultrasound at a pregnancy center for free?”

“For free?” she questions. “No, where is this place?”

We direct her to an address and phone number. She dials the number.

The three of us give her some space as she makes the call, and we begin to pray…

There we were—all four of us—outside Planned Parenthood. One was calling the local pregnancy center; the other three were calling on heaven to open this opportunity of rescue for this woman and her child.

An afternoon appointment was confirmed.

“Do you need a ride?” our young friend asks the student. “I am about to leave and can drive you to the pregnancy center.”

“Yes, please!” the pregnant woman responds with a French accent from her native language.

“May we pray for you?” I boldly get the nerve to ask.

She agrees, and I hold her hand.

I don’t recall the exact words, but I wanted her to know that through our prayers, God sees her. He knows her and understands her doubts, fears, and struggles. We ask God to help this woman and her baby. Her life is valued. She was born into tragic circumstances, yet God has made a way for her. She’ll graduate from a major university with a degree in a couple of months. How’s that for a refugee story!

“God, help this woman to see the hope in her life as the same hope for her baby! Amen.”

The Church’s Mission

We said our goodbyes. My friend and I walked to my car and headed home.

Our young prayer partner drove the woman to her pregnancy center appointment. I have a feeling that sidewalk conversation continued in her car, and a friendship formed. Perhaps, contact numbers were exchanged.

“I have no one,” became I have someone!

Do I think she can graduate and be a mother too? Absolutely!

However, she’s going to need a lot of help and support. Her future is uncertain, and she knows that. And honestly, we know that too.

But the three of us also know the power of the gospel. We see her life, and the life of her child through the hope of Christ. She doesn’t. All she knows is the practical steps she needs to take to afford a living for herself. Can she do it with a baby?

She will get support from the pregnancy center. They do what they do best for women with unplanned pregnancies. But they cannot do it alone.

When I got home, I continued to pray for that woman we encountered outside Planned Parenthood. She did not walk into the doors of that abortion clinic that day. For that, God be the glory!

But what now?

We shared the gospel with her on that sidewalk, but how far does it go?

Does it end at the pregnancy center?

Will the body of Christ—the church— continue the witness of that gospel in her life?

In the pro-life mission, there’s the sidewalk prayers and conversations on the frontlines, the haven of pregnancy centers, and then there’s the church. All three must work together. All three must hold each other accountable to be a witness for the gospel we preach, and the pro-life message we stand upon.

Does the church see itself as an extension of that life mission? An extension of our sidewalk conversation and the pregnancy center’s care of that woman and her baby?

Are we willing to do what we need to do so that a woman will not have to say, “I have no one. I have no choice!”

I am wrecked

I accepted a friend’s invite, and it gave me a sidewalk view. Thank you to all those who continually pray on the frontlines. For all the ways many (and there are many) in the pro-life movement bring a loving, compassionate response to women and men who arrive at an abortion clinic. You are the hands and feet of Jesus Christ. A reminder that the true gospel is lived out on the frontlines.

But I am now wrecked with a burden. What has taken me so long, and why am I not there more often?

It is my prayer that more of my brothers and sisters in Christ will venture outside of their church walls on this mission. Maybe not to the sidewalk outside of an abortion clinic, but to be an extension of support and a witness of the gospel that rescues those in need. To not only offer hope in life’s unplanned situations but to provide the eternal hope of abundant life.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. – John 10:10

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It was one of the last scenes in the movie Unplanned. Abby Johnson, played by actress Ashley Bratcher, had left her job at Planned Parenthood and was at the clinic’s gate boldly sharing with a young woman about protecting the life inside of her. It was while watching that scene when Serena Dyksen felt God telling her; it is now time to share her story.

The release of the film Unplanned—the true-life story of former Planned Parenthood clinic director Abby Johnson who became a pro-life advocate—has coincided with a wave of pro-life legislation enacted in numerous states, challenging the unconstitutional decision in Roe v. Wade.

Alabama’s recent bold pro-life bill does not include an abortion exception for victims of rape or incest, creating a firestorm of opinions even among those who rally in support of overturning Roe v. Wade.

But if you ask Serena Dyksen, if rape should be an exception to allow an abortion, then she wants her testimony to answer that question.

“Women and men are sharing their opinions about abortion and the rape exception,” Serena commented. “Many are speaking about something they don’t know personally and are speaking on my behalf. But the truth is, they don’t know because they have not been through the trauma that I have experienced. It is time for me to talk about my rape and not let others speak for me.”

Serena’s Planned Parenthood Story

Serena grew up in a dysfunctional home with her parents and one sister.  They moved quite frequently, and Serena remembers if her parents couldn’t pay their bills, then they would pack up and move; sometimes leaving in the middle of the night with only the clothes on their backs.

By the age of eleven years old, Serena’s family had moved next to a relative where she often babysat for their children. The husband in the home began to abuse Serena sexually, and at thirteen-years-old Serena found out she was pregnant.

“I didn’t even know the word abortion,” Serena recalls. “I just remember my parents taking me to a doctor who mentioned that word and my mother saying, ‘Yes, we want an abortion.’ I didn’t understand the proper words to define my body at that age. I just let my mom answer all the questions for me because when you grow up in a dysfunctional family, sometimes the best thing to do is to remain quiet.”

They scheduled the abortion, and Serena remembers the people at the clinic informing her mother to be prepared to be harassed by Christians when they got out of their car. “There was already a lot of tension in my home. But I remember being so stressed that there might be people yelling and screaming at us when we arrived at the clinic.”

When they arrived at the abortion clinic, there was no one outside. “My mom was so relieved that there were no ‘church people’ there,” Serena remembers.

Serena shares her experience that day:

“We enter the clinic, and I was called back to a room alone. I remember the woman talking about clumps and describing abortion. She asked me if I understood, and I nodded yes, but I had no clue what was happening to me. She took me into another room where I lied down. The doctor came in and smiled at me and said, ‘This won’t take long.’ I remember experiencing the most excruciating pain that I had ever felt, and I began to scream. The doctor shouted at me to shut up. A nurse came in and held my hand, but nothing helped to relieve that kind of pain. They then moved me into a room with other women, and I sat down on a recliner chair. When I stood up from that chair, I remember a gush of blood coming out of me. My dad came in and carried me out to the car. After that day, my abortion was never talked about again.”

Trauma and Redemption

photo credit: Serena Dyksen

Several years later, at the age of sixteen, Serena and her boyfriend found out she was pregnant again. “My boyfriend was from a Christian family, and he knew sex outside of marriage was wrong, but when faced with our situation, he asked me what I thought about abortion.” Serena remembers her strong reaction to that painful word, “I said, ‘no way’ and proceeded to tell him my whole tragic story when I was thirteen years old.”

Together, Serena and her boyfriend agreed to not go through with the abortion and then his parents and their church community reached out to them. “Our church surrounded us with so much love and support. We had our daughter and got married. We didn’t know how to parent, but the church helped us. We were broke, but the church supported us,” Serena recalled. “The very people who we were told would be harassing us outside the abortion clinic, were the people who loved and cared for us in our time of need!”

Serena and her husband were blessed with a son two years later, and by the age of twenty-three-years-old, they bought their first home and were living a good life as a family of four.

But their happy home changed when the family experienced a traumatic event concerning their two children. That event triggered something inside of Serena, and she began to fall apart emotionally. “I realized that I had not dealt with my rape and abortion, and it led me to a path of destruction,” Serena acknowledged. “I moved out of the house, leaving my husband and my two children, and turned to drugs and alcohol to numb my pain. My husband was always there for me, but I pushed everyone away. I was running full-speed to hell!”

After drinking heavily one night, Serena came to her breaking point. “People were tired of me reaching out for help and never following through. I had burned all my bridges,” Serena admitted. “I cried out to God in my car in my destitute and drunken state, and He met me there,” she testified. “I felt God telling me to go home, and by God’s grace, I made it home safely with my husband opening the door and welcoming me with open arms!”

That was the last day Serena reached for alcohol or drugs. She went for counseling and began to experience complete healing for all the trauma in her life. One day, while reading the scriptures, the Lord directed her to Lamentations 3:55-58 (NIV): “I called on your name, Lord, from the depths of the pit. You heard my plea: ‘Do not close your ears to my cry for relief.’ You came near when I called you, and you said, ‘Do not fear.’ You took up my case; you redeemed my life.”

“God set me completely free,” Serena rejoiced! “He changed me forever!”

Life Has Purpose

Looking back on the abuse and trauma of her life, Serena has a very different perspective from the voices that try to speak on her behalf regarding the rape exception for abortion. “There is not a day that goes by where I do not think of that aborted baby. What if always comes to mind,” she questions. “I know God had a purpose for that baby. It doesn’t matter how that baby was conceived. That life had a purpose!”

Serena knows the difficult circumstances surrounding rape and abortion. How do you bring a child into the world from such a tragic event is a question filled with doubt and uncertainty, but Serena wants to use her life story to answer that question with honesty.

“I think it is easy for people to say rape is the worst thing that could happen to me. But they don’t know what I experienced behind those closed doors at Planned Parenthood,” she reflected. My abortion was traumatizing. They lied to me, and they didn’t love or care for me at the young age of only thirteen years old. Abortion did not fix the problem; it only added more trauma to my life.”

When confronted with the question of whether rape is an exception to allow an abortion, Serena states emphatically, “No, absolutely not! It does not fix anything. It adds more pain, more lies, more guilt, and more shame. Abortion keeps women in shackles!”

Today, Serena lives in complete freedom from her past, and she knows now is the time to talk about her healing. “God is so good!” she testifies.

She finds comfort from Genesis 50:20 (ESV): “As for me, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.”

Serena and her husband have been married for twenty-five years and are proud grandparents to a beautiful granddaughter. They both serve on the board of North Central Indiana Teen Challenge, a faith-based drug rehabilitation program for men. Serena ministers to women in jail and those out on the streets. She shares her story and the message of the gospel of Jesus Christ, that brings healing and redemption.

photo credit: Serena Dyksen

“I didn’t want to share this part of my life,” Serena admits. “I felt people would look down on me, but that is such a lie! People need to talk about abortion and rape. The church needs to talk about it. Some women are not ready to talk about their past abortion, but when they are, the church needs to be prepared to walk alongside them, love them, and point them to the cross for their healing. Discipleship is not easy, and sometimes it’s messy, but I am so grateful that I had people in the church who loved me and directed me to the truth of God’s word.”

If Serena could pass on one message of hope to women who have not dealt with the pain of their abortion, it would be that there is healing. She shares, “Everyone needs to walk through the healing process of their past abortion, no matter the circumstances. If you don’t, you will be walking through deception, pain, and all the bondage that goes with that. But the same God who sent people to show His love for me is the same God who will redeem your life too. I want to share my testimony because it is God who shines through my story!”

 

 

 

To learn more about how the church can support life issues and bring healing to the post-abortive go to:  www.makinglifedisciples.com

 

 

 

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If there is one small glimmer of hope that has come from the state of New York’s late-term abortion bill, it’s that there is a conscience among people waking up to the evil of abortion.

But I am going to pivot from talking about that bill or even how other states are pushing forward the same type of legislation because my heart breaks for the post-abortive mothers and fathers.

What do you feel when you witness this news flooding media and social media? Are you reminded about that dreadful day? I want to know your heart, but I especially want to hear your voice.

I am not talking about those who stand by their “choice” of abortion and who have no remorse. My heart goes after those who have done the work of forgiveness before God about past abortions. Those who are walking in freedom but who share stories of regret.

I am sure it is difficult to watch both sides of the argument of abortion from your perspective. There is outrage on both sides and in the midst of it, there is your story. Perhaps, an experience that you have hidden for years and still can’t face for fear of the shame wrapped around it.

Or maybe, you have dealt with your abortion and found healing through the pain and trauma. You now walk in the freedom that can only come from the power of Jesus Christ that fills that deep sorrow with inexplicable joy.

Regardless of where you are in your healing process from abortion, today I want to encourage you.

There is a scripture that I have always read in the context of the unborn child. You often see images of this scripture in promoting the sanctity of life. But as you read it this time, let it speak to you and who you are in Christ as a post-abortive mother or father.

For you created my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother’s womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you

When I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

Your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

Were written in your book

Before one of them came to be.  

Psalm 139:13-16

 

The character of God loves us in our most unworthy state. Nothing has been hidden from Him in our life story. He knew you before you were born and each day —even those painful, tragic days— were seen by Him. Yet, He loves us and wraps us in forgiveness when we seek it.

Just think of the contrast between abortion and that scripture. Abortion speaks the lie that there is no value in the life of the unborn, but God breathes into us worth and value by the very act of forming us in our mother’s womb. That scripture demonstrates the love of God shining through the darkness of our world.

I recently saw this post:

 

Your past abortion might have created a deep brokenness within you, but it does not define you. If you walk in freedom because you know the God of this universe has forgiven and healed you from your abortion, then live that testimony out. Speak about the lies of abortion that our world refuses to acknowledge.

Scripture has already made it clear where your identity comes from and who formed you. Be that pro-life voice that is there to love and heal those broken by abortion. Share your testimony of restoration to the post-abortive community. Only you, who have felt the physical and emotional wounds of abortion, can speak the truth to the outrage around us.

Know this, even with all the clamor and noise, your life, your story, and —your testimony— matters!

The next time you see Psalm 139: 13-14, remind yourself that it was YOU who was knit in your mother’s womb for a purpose. Share what God has done in your life—even in the regret of your past abortion. Bring healing to a world desperate to know the truth.

Your pro-life identity speaks the loudest among us because abortion is where your ministry began. Your testimony is now your pro-life identity. Be that voice!

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  Guest contributor: Abby Klose, college sophomore
 

Since most media sources won’t report on the March for Life that took place on Friday and they consistently fail to portray the ideology of an average pro-lifer, I’ve decided to share my views as someone who is pro-life. My goal is not to change anyone’s opinion, but to give a glimpse into the heart behind the pro-life movement for those who have yet to experience it.

Today my heart grieves a little extra for the lives lost to abortion because of the circumstances of their birth or the makeup of their DNA. It pains me to know that someone won’t be born today because somebody else failed to see their value. The idea that the circumstances of my own birth afforded me life, while someone else’s circumstances brought them a death sentence places a burden on my heart to advocate for those who were less fortunate.

How can we expect to eliminate discrimination when it is encouraged while we are still in the womb?

How can we expect those who are born into unfortunate circumstances to understand their worth when we constantly tell pregnant women that their babies are better off dead?

I long for the day when we treat every human being with the dignity that they deserve BOTH inside AND outside of the womb.

I long for the day when we refuse to cite moments when dignity was robbed from humans outside of the womb as a reason to rob dignity from mothers and their children within the womb. I say mothers too, because abortion hurts them just as much.

I long for the day when every person who calls themselves pro-life actually treats those outside the womb with the respect and the dignity they deserve. That includes post-abortive mothers. Those who call themselves pro-life but mistreat humans outside of the womb are NOT pro-life.


I long for the day when our first response to an unplanned pregnancy is to rally the troops and consider how we can best support women. On that day, abortion will truly be unthinkable.

I pray for a day when the church as a whole awakens and recognizes their sin of apathy on an issue that matters to God. I pray that their eyes will be opened and their hearts burdened.

All this being said, I don’t live with a misty-eyed view of life. We live in a world with pain and suffering, and that’s not going to change. But I also believe there is a light far greater than the darkness in this world. His name is Jesus Christ, and it is the power of Christ that can redeem any situation. He takes our brokenness and turns it into a testimony. He brings light to dark situations. Some people may be born with an extra chromosome. Some may be born into an abusive home. Some were a product of violence. Even still, I believe there is value in their life. This is why I am unashamedly pro-life.

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 “But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.”  -Luke 2:19

My heart has never been as full as when I gave birth to each of my children. It sounds cliché but giving birth is truly a miracle. The exhaustion of each pregnancy and the pain of childbirth climax to what I consider the greatest emotional experiences of my life, and I treasure each one of those memories.

I guess that’s why during the Christmas season,  I become this emotional mess who can’t help but cry when I witness a living nativity scene in a Christmas play or reread scripture about Christ’s birth. It’s all about that swaddled baby. Shepherds and Kings kneel at the foot of the manger and Angels worship the miracle of the Christ child. And I sit with tears welling up because I can relate to treasuring the blessing of birth and the three gifts God gave to me.

I cannot even fathom Mary’s emotions, and her pondering God’s choice to allow her to carry in her womb the miracle baby— the salvation to the world.

God chose the most inconvenient circumstances for Mary to have a baby. An unwed, teenage mother who has to live with the cultural shame of an unplanned pregnancy. This could have led to the end of young Mary’s future. Giving birth out of wedlock could have forced Mary into a life of begging and prostitution, as that was the risk in those cultural times. But God asked Mary and Joseph to have faith and trust in this unplanned event in their lives as His intentional promise to the world.It was a choice to see beyond their circumstances, and faith to understand God could bring hope and glory from having a baby.

I don’t know about you, but the birth of Christ, especially at this time of year, draws me to my knees in prayer.

We live in a world where babies are in the headlines of politically motivated news stories instead of in birth announcements. Where words like pregnancy, unplanned, and birth are overpowered by the word “choice.” Babies are too many times reflected in sentiments of being unwanted instead of desired or treasured.

While our society gets bolder in shouting their abortions and embracing a woman’s right to “choose” as a cultural norm, I can’t help but reflect on that intentional message at Bethlehem.

God was deliberate in the plan of the miraculous conception of Jesus from a virgin and all the circumstances surrounding His birth. That baby—held by such a young mother and a father who risked societal shame to live out this mighty plan of God— is the hope of our salvation.

Ponder that! Let it sink in. We are the intended purpose of God’s plan. A plan derived from Mary and Joseph’s unplanned.

There will never be an understanding of the hope and sacredness of life without the acknowledgment of the Savior. Christ’s birth, death, and resurrection define the value of all life. It gives every baby’s life worth—planned or unplanned. When we understand why Mary “treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart,” then we can truly comprehend the sanctity of life.

This is why the gospel message must be wrapped in the pro-life message. Without the divine plan, it’s impossible to understand faith in the unplanned.

So, once again, as I watch that living nativity in remembrance of that miraculous day in Bethlehem and become an emotional mess of a mother, I pray that more people will know the gift of salvation. The hope of life. And treasure God’s intentional plan for all the unplanned circumstances in our lives.

*This is an adapted reblog from 2015.

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Last week, I wondered if I should keep blogging. Since then I have received new followers to this blog. I took that as a sign to keep going. Obviously, people are reading. When I am not here writing my thoughts, I also write for an organization called The Radiance Foundation. It is led by my friends Ryan and Bethany Bomberger. They are passionate about speaking up for the lives of the unborn and their vision is to affirm that every human life has purpose.

The following is a link to my recent article at The Radiance Foundation. If you like what you read here, you will love following their site. Check them out after reading my latest article.

Click here to read my latest——>>>>> Life, Unity and the Church Rising Up Against Abortion

 (March for Life event with friends of the Radiance Foundation)

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All it takes is a “like”, a nod, or a thumbs-up to point to the value of life in the womb.

Sometimes the strongest messages of life are accidental. They are chance happenings. An Instagram photo of a pregnant belly at week number 30, a video of unborn twins moving in a mother’s womb, a Facebook post of “We’re Pregnant” after a friend’s struggle with infertility or a blog of that designer’s nursery with a beautifully decorated room for their youngest client.

Nods of life happen all around us. We give a thumbs-up to a post, we hit that heart emoji, and we embrace a culture of life unintentionally. It’s because at the heart of our human condition we intrinsically know the value of life. We immediately react to those double lines on a pregnancy test because we know what incredible gift a baby is to the world.

It’s true that we are also surrounded by intentional messages such as political slogans, hashtag movements, campaigns, or purposefully driven memes that point away from the beauty of life. But the older you get, the more you understand that the greatest lessons are not from the calculated moments but from the accidental or spontaneous instances that add to a person’s life story.

We don’t have to look very far to see inadvertent messages that point to life. I am encouraged that many, unintentionally, are pointing to the value of life in the womb. They are not politically driven or planned pro-life stances. But they are spontaneous moments that speak to the sanctity of life.

May we celebrate the unintentional-deliberately- to highlight life inside and outside the womb!

Here is one example:
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I wasn’t shocked.

The article tagline by CBS News kept popping up on my Twitter newsfeed. It read: “Iceland is on pace to virtually eliminate Down syndrome through abortion.”

The best response was by actress and prolife advocate Patricia Heaton:

She is correct. The headline just confirmed the horrific statistics of what many of us in the pro-life community already know regarding the rates of abortion especially concerning a T21 (Down syndrome) diagnosis.

It’s not just Iceland. Research has shown that France has a 96% abortion rate for babies diagnosed with Down syndrome in the womb. The UK reports rates as high as 92% to 100%. Then there’s the United States where a 2012 study found that 61% to 93% of babies diagnosed with T21 in the womb have resulted in abortions.

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Photo Credit: Kelly Vandivert

The news from Iceland and the abortion rates immediately made me think of my friend Kelly and her beautiful daughter Eva. Kelly and her husband Eric are proud parents of two children, Ian and Eva. When Kelly was pregnant with Eva, she was diagnosed with T21 early in her pregnancy. I remember her posts on Facebook about the experience she went through when Kelly and Eric were first given the results.

I wanted to interview her about the recent Iceland headlines and get her thoughts on the country’s results of “eradicating” Down syndrome births through abortion. Instead, she wrote to me a beautiful testimony of life, redemption from shame, and about being a society that embraces the beauty of God-given life in all circumstances.

The title of the CBS News article posed the question, “What kind of society do you want to live in?” I ask that you read Kelly’s heartfelt words in their entirety, and ask yourself that same question. Words are never more powerful than when they come from the courage to speak the truth in love and from a personal experience that guides others toward freedom.

 

When I think about Iceland and the abortion rates there, here, etc., I think of worth. Specifically, who is worthy of life? 

Honestly, I don’t often feel that I am worthy. I have been given this gift, this life, and I often fall short of living a life without fear. A life of freedom, a life I am meant to live. I stay wrapped in fear of judgment, fear of failure, fear of standing out when I’m supposed to fit in, and fear of fitting in when I’m supposed to stand out. I let the outside ugly clamor of the masses dictate who I am some days and I despise myself for allowing it. I get worked up about money, friends, family, appearance, my house… But I’m learning that my worth has nothing to do with that. My worth lies within something bigger than myself. It’s in the very thing that ties us all together. We are all the same no matter where our IQ ranks, what salary we rake in, our skin color, or what size we wear. It’s in our common humanity.  

The fact is, we all struggle through this world and we all play a part. We are not a society of individuals. We are a family. We are children of God.  

So why does anyone feel they have the right to decide who gets to live and who doesn’t? For those who think this boils down to pro-choice or pro-life, I disagree. It’s beyond that. From what I know, people who have abortions do so because they don’t feel prepared or able to care for a child. Perhaps they’re shamed into hiding an unintended pregnancy in the first place. Or they have no help, no support and are afraid. I would know. I was there once. And because of it, I don’t agree with abortion. It robs you of peace and fills you with shame. At least it has me. So when I was faced with a choice to abort at 12 weeks in a PLANNED pregnancy with my second child, I was appalled.  

My husband, Eric, and I were told that there was something wrong at my 12th week. I was given a 1 in 4 chance that my baby had a chromosomal disorder, BUT most likely something terminal and not T21 (Down syndrome or DS). We opted to do a CVS (Chorionic Villus Sampling) to test part of the placenta. Before the procedure, Eric and I talked about a diagnosis of T21 as a relief and not a worry. So when we received the results of T21, we were hopeful.  

When I began to read of the high abortion rates of diagnosed pregnancies with DS, I started to fear for my unborn child. Would she be rejected? Would people make fun of her? Why did so many people abort at the same time of pregnancy and diagnosis that we found ourselves in? And why did a genetic counselor HAVE to tell me how they would abort the baby should I decide later to have an abortion. Later? I thought I was at the cut-off deadline where even the “pro-choicers” agreed that the tiny baby in my womb was, in fact, a baby? But despite my request that she stop with the abortion details, she continued to describe that my baby’s heartbeat would be stopped somehow and then medicine would induce labor, etc. The counselor told me I had several weeks to decide, and if I changed my mind- past Virginia’s abortion time frame- she could inform me of which state to go to for a late term abortion.  

I was never asked if I wanted to meet a family with a child with Down syndrome. I didn’t learn about any websites or resources. All I was given was a little pamphlet about T21. I remember there was this beautiful little girl on the cover of the brochure. She had blonde hair and the sweetest face. I carried that pamphlet with me for months during my pregnancy. And I wasn’t concerned about what was in it. No, I was busy praying that my daughter would be as cute as that little girl. Not because it mattered to me, but I thought that if she had light hair and light eyes that she would be more easily accepted. That people would overlook her “different” features which today mesmerize me. I prayed for her not to look too different so people would like her. Awful. I know. Prior to this, I had no thoughts about anyone with special needs being subjected to judgment or whether they were worthy of life.  

Let me refer back to my abortion again. I believe abortion is selfish. But I never considered it to be about whether a life was worthy to be born. It was about my failure, my inabilities, and my sins. I can point to where those lies were learned…. but it won’t erase history to dwell on those lies. No. Abortion is wrapped up in self. This thing, this choice about aborting a child with T21- it’s about worth. It’s judgment. It’s putting one’s self above another. It’s not about feeling inadequate or ashamed but superior. Maybe those who’ve made that choice would disagree. But I stand on it. If you tried and wanted a child and then received a diagnosis-that’s judgment. That baby is a baby as it’s almost the end of the first trimester. Most agree on that one fact.  

I watched on that sonogram as a stranger stuck a needle close to the sack in my womb. I watched my Eva kick away from that needle, she knew something was a danger to her. She was trying to get away. She was thinking, her heart was beating, and she has worthy back then as much as she is today. Even Eric cried watching during the procedure, and that is a rarity. There was this tiny, vulnerable child. This procedure was done two days after my screening. How many people ever actually test to confirm the screenings but go ahead with the abortion anyway? They can and have been so wrong.  

I’m rambling, but I have so many thoughts and feelings about this. I hid an abortion out of shame, but I feel it is so relevant to my story. To Eva’s story. I am not proud of it. When people ask me how many kids I have, I say 2 but in my heart, I say 3. I long to meet that child. But I can’t erase time. Tears and prayers help. But the idea of aborting based on T21….horrible. I get so tired of people making excuses that some couldn’t handle it….not everyone is as strong as me…ha! Strong? I failed my first child. I am a murderer. That will cling to me forever as I seek forgiveness. God has forgiven, but I haven’t.  

So how do these other women abort at 11, 12 + weeks and not hate themselves? Their baby was perfectly HEALTHY. They only knew they had an extra chromosome. So what? It isn’t a death sentence.

I want to tell you about my children’s names. Ian was born out of wedlock, and he was a difficult guilt-ridden pregnancy full of depression and anxiety. As I struggled with my previous abortion I chose his name as Ian. It is the Celtic version of John. My favorite book of the bible. John… God is forgiving….God is gracious. I needed a reminder of that, and I have it every day in my son. Then when I was pregnant with Eva, she was the next punch in the gut regarding abortion and painful memories. I chose a name she could hopefully say with ease. It’s a name that means LIFE.

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Photo Credit: Kelly Vandivert

Her middle name Victoria was on purpose as well. She will have a LIFE VICTORIOUS. And she will. She has brought our entire family more joy than we could ever imagine. She is amazing. And she is worthy. And all that superficial fear that makes us feel unworthy…she doesn’t have that. She embraces life abundantly and teaches me each day how to do so. How to heal from my past and allow myself to walk in the sunshine and to run with abandon. I wish the world would catch up to us. It would be a much better place. Eva has a role in this family and in this world, and I am honored to be her mother.

 

For more information about Down syndrome go to: The National Down Syndrome Society or at the National Association for Down Syndrome .
If anyone is seeking firsthand experience and would like to reach out to Kelly for support, she can be reached at kellyloveseva@gmail.com .